LAPD Wife

Sleeping with a Police Officer

Police officers work wonky shifts. They have weird hours and overtime and mega stress. Is it any wonder that so many have trouble sleeping normally? Jake goes through periods of insomnia. He doesn't have it all the time, but it seems to hit in waves. We're fine for a month or two and then - bam! - no sleep for a week.

And when Jake doesn't sleep, I don't sleep, so it's a problem for us both. When we first got married, he used to just get up and watch late-night TV for an hour or two until he felt sleepy again and I really wasn't bothered. But these last few years watching TV doesn't work for him. In fact, he hasn't found anything that works.

And so here is how our night goes:

• 0-30 mins: Jakes tosses back and forth. Renee sleeps through it all.
• 30-60 mins: Jakes tosses back and forth with greater enthusiasm. Renee still sleeps.
• 60-90 mins: Jake starts punching his pillow and huffing and puffing loudly. Renee wakes up, but pretends not to hear him. She secretly hopes he'll go watch tv or something and let her get back to sleep.
• 90-120 mins: Jake "accidently" nudges Renee a few times. Apparently at this point if he can't sleep, nobody sleeps. Renee "nudges" him right back and tells him to suck it up. He looks so pathetic, though, that she feels bad and rubs his back, trying to get him to relax.
• 120 mins later: Jake is asleep and Renee is glaring at him, thinking about her long day volunteering at son's school tomorrow on a few hours sleep.

Long story short, we're both tired and grumpy the next day. But it's funny, when he talks about his insomnia with other people, it's always "his." Never "ours."  Hey, even though I'm not the insomniac, I'm experiencing it too - shouldn't people feel sorry for me also? 

Meaningful Bling for Your Officer

I've written articles in the past trying to help readers find that perfect gift for their men and women in blue. There are times that we really want to give our officers something meaningful as a gift. And I'm sorry, but the latest in ankle-holsters or the newest Spyderco knife just isn't going to work. I've suggested things like St. Christopher medals or miniature family pictures inside keychains or pendants.

Well, I just found the next great thing to add to this list. Jewelry designer Colleen Berg, based right here in Southern California, makes these great custom pieces that incorporate the fingerprints of loved ones. My mother-in-law received one this Christmas. Her three sons each gave Berg an imprint of their thumbs in a special mold. She then made this one-of-a-kind necklace that incorporates all three prints.

She uses this theme in her "Thumbprint Collection." What I like about this is that there are also several very guy-friendly designs. You could take prints of your kids, even you, and have them made into a very masculine dogtag, bracelet or keychain. It's a very sweet way of sending a unique part of yourself and your family along with your officer to work every day.

I'll admit - I'm a woman who likes her jewelry. I'm married to a man who doesn't wear much in the way of bling at all. His wedding ring and watch is all you'll ever see him wearing. (And the wedding ring only once in awhile - don't get me started.) He's been given a few heirloom rings from his father and has a couple of pendants for chains, but those just sit in the box they came in.

Now, I finally found something that he says he would "think about" wearing. For Jake, this is a big step. And it's something that would made me feel like I'm sending a part of me and the kids to be with him on the job. Pretty cool.

I was surfing around on Colleen's website and was also fascinated by her line of "Nursing Necklaces." Huh? I had to check this out. What a great idea. Necklaces made of beautiful eye-catching stones, pretty for us - yes, but also eye-catching for nursing babies. The necklaces are made using "Picasso Jasper, which is known for its weight-loss properties and pink, blue or green Chalcedony, which is prized for its lactation properties," according to the website. Cool.

And pretty darn near indestructible, by the way she describes them. This sounds like a good idea for a baby shower gift, if you and several other girlfriends are going in together for a fab gift. Beware if you start to surf around her site. There are a lot of gorgeous pieces there to see.

Weeds

I've been doing some volunteering this year at a local museum. I am a docent who helps lead  elementary school tours that visit the museum for field trips. This last week we had a group of 3rd graders (about 9 years old) from Pacoima visit us at the museum. Part of the field trip involves hiking around a park.

One of the boys developed a crush on me and was following me around the whole field trip. He came up to me excitedly, held up a cigarette butt he had found somewhere in the park and exclaimed "Dude! look what I found - It's WEED!"

I chuckled, but it was also kind of sad. We found a trash can, he threw it away, I explained that it was a plain old cigarette, but that he was doing a great job by helping us clean up the litter that someone else had so thoughtlessly left behind. The sad part for me was that the first thought in this kid's head, when seeing a common cigarette butt, was that it was marijuana.

I was telling Officer Jake the story later as we were all driving somewhere together this weekend. I laughed as I bet Jake that our son, at 8 years old, probably doesn't know what "Weed" means. He's had the drug talks and all, but I doubt he knows all the slang. On impulse, I turned around in the car and asked our son what "weed" was to him.

"Well," he answered, reciting this as if he were in class, "a weed is a plant that grows where you don't want it to grow. It steals the sun and vitamins from the ground and kills out the good plants you want to grow around it. We yank them out of the ground when they grow in your flowers, Mom."

I'm so glad his innocence hasn't been lost yet.

LAPD Archived Crime Scene Photos

Cool story read over at Downtown News titled "Scenes of the Crime: LAPD Seeks to Preserve Striking Historic Photographs." Seems that nearly a million images of both LAPD crime scene and pubicity photos from the 1920's to the 1960's are in need of a company to sort, digitize and archive this amazing collection of our department's history. Read the full story - very interesting. 

The Box

There is a box that has been sitting in our bedroom now for 6 weeks. I found it when cleaning out the storage room in our garage. It was full of Jake's work stuff. Gun cleaning supplies, old booklets and handouts from work, a traffic accident ruler, etc. I asked him if he needed it, it had obviously been misplaced when we moved to the new house over 4 years ago and he hadn't missed it.

Silly me. Of course he needed it. He went through the box, reminiscing as items brought up memories from earlier in his career. Then he moved it to our bedroom, in a corner, to "sort through and put away."

Over a month ago. The box still sits in the same place and I'm afraid to lift it up - there is old gun cleaning fluid in there that looks like it belonged to a mad scientist last century. And who knows what else that could leak on the carpet? I asked him 2 weeks ago to please either go through it or at least move it back to the storage room out of the way. Sure, sure, right away.

It's still there. It has become, in the words of my 8-year-old son, my arch-enemy. I glare at it every time I have to vacuum around it. And I curse when I walk into it in the dark. It's become a battle of the wills - who will give in and move the damn box first.

What kills me is that while I am obsessing about it more and more, I doubt he even remembers it exists. I'll end up giving in and moving it myself eventually. But, I'll hold out awhile longer, just to see if this time he'll notice.

Of course, there is "The Pile" in the closet that is still there from a year ago. Vests, a jacket, helmet, etc, spilling out of a cubby in the closet. I've vacummed around it so long there are permanent marks in the carpet. We're both very stubborn people. Ok, I'm stubborn - he's just clueless.

Basket of Sunshine

Here's the annual picture of a basket of the oranges and lemons from the trees in my backyard. I love this time of year, the oranges are all ripe on the tree and the new blossoms are coming out - ever smell orange blossoms? It's heavenly - I move a lawn chair near the tree and just close my eyes and breaaaathhhhhe. It's amazing.

Women and SWAT

Here's a good read from "Cop the Truth": LAPD selects female officer for SWAT training. I'm interested to see how this all works out - both for Officer Grasso and for SWAT. Hopefully for the best for all.